Tuesday, February 16, 2010

worry

I have been so worried with this pregnancy. When we found out we were pregnant with Claire, we'd just decided waiting a few years to start a family might be nice. We were so excited about a baby, but I also was surprised and if I'd miscarried, I'd have taken it as a sign to just wait a bit. If I'd miscarried then, I wouldn't have know what I'd be missing. So this time, I know all that I'd be missing and I know that I want all of that to be mine.

So I worry over every twinge. I worry if I don't feel as nauseated today as I felt yesterday. I worry about stress, even though I'm not feeling particularly stressed. (I'm busy, yes, but I get less riled about less than I have in the past).

I am very, very tired of worrying. I lay down for a nap and pray and rest and hope and then feel as though I will never figure out anything. But I am: figuring a few things out.

3 comments:

Angela and David Kidd said...

I've got no great advice but can just say that I think every mom understands what you are going through. I hope the second trimester arrives quickly for you so you can stop worrying.

Joanna Goodman said...

I worried a lot in the beginning. Learning (trying!) to not worry, though, even as labor looms :) Rest in Jesus, I'll think of you and pray for you.

Wish we could sit around being pregnant together :) I sure do miss you!

Clare said...

i have a feeling i will be way more cautious the second time around...for exactly that reason, i know what i'd be missing if anything happened.