Sunday, November 22, 2009

wanting words

So ends my solo weekend (plus) with Claire. All went well. I didn't lose it, crying or raging that I just sob sob can't sob sob do it any longer! I just noticed the empty spots where I would have passed Claire off while I was cooking dinner or going to the bathroom or in desperate need of some solitude. She was a gem, though, and we made it. But I did find myself thinking Words. Get some words, little lady!

Lately I've been envying the moms who can say, "Wait, honey. Use your words." And their toddler can actually tell them that they want that hairbrush or those crayons or they need a drink or they're hungry for another cracker.

Saturday night I was fixing Claire's dinner and getting ready for a Skype call with my in-laws. I was busy. And Claire was jabbering away and then the jabbering turned to yammering turned to fairly direct insistence that I pick her up Right This Minute. "Claire darling," I said, "Mama is fixing dinner and then we are going to talk with Grandma and Grandpa Marslender and then you will have a bath."

"Tucka tucka tucka ooh be guga guga tucka," Claire held my pant leg, "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

"And then, baby girl, comes bedtime. Do you know how wonderful bedtime is?" I was using that bright, false voice that says I am being very, very patient. I didn't want to lose it after holding it together so well for four days. So in the middle of "Stop. Claire, stop. Please let go. Okay, honey. Alright. Wait a minute. Here we go. Stop. No, that's hot. That's too hot. Wait." and tripping over little feet and undoing tiny fists, I managed to deliver dinner, log on to Skype, and not freak out.

Okay, I freaked out a little. I also worried that Justin would be in a plane crash and the rest of my life would be me noticing an empty spot where wordless Claire's Papa should be to take her off my hands so I can just fix dinner, please.

But he's home safe. I have a nice moment to myself Right This Minute, and dinner is almost done.


DC Running Mama said...

Fixing dinner is *the most stressful* time of my day. Sometimes, I'm great and manage to feed Nathan and make a yummy meal. Sometimes, hubby gets home and I growl at him that we're having hotdogs and I don't want to hear anything about it (not that he actually cares).

Kudos to you for being a single mama!

Clare said...

i seriously can't wait for curious about what her voice will sound like with something other than babble! glad you survived the single parent weekend!

Angela and David Kidd said...

4 days is A LONG TIME alone. I love saying to Zach "use your words" and then "oh, ha ha ha, you don't have any words". Although it's crazy because we are entering the phase where he gets about a new word a day but.... and I hate to give you the bad news .... it doesn't stop the whining.

N.D. said...

Glad you made it through the weekend. They are tough going solo!! And I totally wish they could talk.

Anonymous said...

we have words, here. lots and lots and lots of words. and i still can't understand what they want, sometimes!

jessica said...

Yeah, I've been known to say "use your words" lately, but it isn't helping ;) My 3yo has a super vocabulary, but likes to "speak" in the growls and grunts of whichever wild animal she's currently imitating. Oh, and I have to guess the correct animal before she'll even let up.

I had a few nights solo over the summer, and I know how trying (and tiring) that can be. Those little moments add up!

Clare said...

random...a real life friend of mine went to high school in colombia at the same school you were teaching at apparently! she saw your blog title on my list and looked and said it was her school!!

Joanna Goodman said...

hmm... I'm pretty sure I've heard that voice you used on Claire to keep you from freaking out :) Fall, 2003, Viroqua, WI. (I'm sure I deserved it, though)